Bart: Play? All plays suck, all the time and always will and everyone knows it. Homer: Look we'll compromise, we'll go see a play that Lisa doesn't wanna see. Springfield Billy: I came here for the legalized gambling. Guy: But Springfield Billy, we don't have legalized gambling here. Springfield Billy: Sure you do. I saw a bumper sticker that said Free Ti-bet!
Shelbyvillians: :to The Simpsons: Hoot hoot hoot hoot hoot hoot Homer: Hoot hoot hoot hoot hoot! Moe: Hey how bout we open a fancy restaraunt and when people check their hats and coats we steal them. Marge: Why do you come to these meetings? Moe: Free water. Gehry: And none of this would have happened if not for a letter I received from one little girl. Marge: I wrote that letter! Gehry: You wrote I was the bestest architect in the world. Carl: I thought this was gonna be the soundtrack to the movie Beethoven. Was I sadly mistaken?
Lenny: Sounds better on my cell phone :plays Beethoven over phone: Warden: Barely finished high school, you've challenged me to fight six times since the interview began. Homer: Make it seven! Homer: But he misread my pee! He misread my pee! Wiggum: It's unlawful for a man to be hatless during daylight hours. Ah Smithers if I didn't arrest you that night in the park I'm not gonna arrest you now. Warden: How'd you like to be a full time rat? Homer: Really? You mean eat cheese, gnaw through electrical cords, things like that? Mr. Burns: Excellent, now what have you got for me? Homer: Homer Simpson has become a snitch. Mr. Burns: Tell me something I don't know! Homer: Sometimes I go to the movies alone. Marge: The prison snitch is killed, and that could be you, because YOU'RE THE PRISON SNITCH! Homer: What are you guys looking at, you never seen bling bling before? Mother Dexter: What's your turtles name? Bart: Uh, Apron Boobs-face? Mother Dexter: Really, well lets go find it. And what's your name? Bart: Um, Shoes.. Butt-back?
Kent: Our expensive Thermocam 3000 is finally being used for something. This red glow is the heat from a pack of inmates who are desperately looking for prison snitch Homer Simpson, this massive blob over here who's attempting to hide in the kitchen area. Good luck, blobby!
Fat Tony: There's the filthy rat we're gonna kill. And his wife, who sometimes drives my son home from school. Marge: Oh you must be Michael's dad! Homer: The guards are sadistic and cruel! Warden: I can't help the way I am. When I was a boy I saw my father murdered before my eyes. By me!
Homer: Listen to me! This whole building is unsafe! They cut corners everywhere. People ! It's a death trap! Bart: No dad you fell asleep in front of the TV watching The Towering Inferno. Homer: How do you know the title of my prophetic vision!?
