Lisa/Janey: Hell-o operator, get me number nine, and if you disconnect me, i'll chop of your be-hind the 'frigerator, there was a piece of glass, Miss Lucy sat upon it and it cut her big fat as-k me no more questions, I'll call you no more - OW! Jimbo: Watcha realizing, jerk? Bart: That i'm not a kid anymore. Kearney: It's harsh. I knew I was an adult the day the judge said, we're trying you as an adult.
Captain: I've been told I'm a good listener, but when you're a captain, you never know when people are just flattering you. Yarr, he's gone.Darnit! I just want a friend who isn't a work friend. Lisa: If you're feeling depressed, do what I do and write something. A novel, a play. Bart: Or I could write something thats not gay. Homer: Bart's shirt is a classic, Marge. Just like Keep On Truckin' as if I would ever want to stop truckin! Database: Aaaaah-I wish I had that shirt. It's clever, funny and would cover my boy boobs nicely.
Rod: Daddy can I buy this one? Ned: Lets see, Get Bent? Well the only thing that could mean is kneel down and pray. WeIll take the whole box. Get bent everyone! Moe: Do you have a t-shirt with Calvin peeing on Hobbes? Bart: Sorry! Moe: Oh. Well what do you got him peeing on. Wiggum: Are any of those my size? Extra extra extra extra extra extra large. Krusty: We've got all your favourite characters. Itchy, Scratchy, Poochie, Austin Powers Itchy, Itchy Poochie, ScratchBob Itchpants, Confederate Itchy, and Osama Bin Scratchy. Goose: Sorry that's my old number. Let me give you the new one. Oh darn it's out of ink. But my phone number's on the pen. Oh it's my old phone number. I'll call you. Goose: Hello Simpsons! Homer: :impressed: You broke in! Homer: Yeah nothing makes parents happier when an eccentric single man takes an interest in their child. Marge: What a delightful sprite!
Burns: Smithers want to go get a cup of coffee? Smithers: I just had one sir. Burns: What the, why is everyone so insolent today. Smithers: Today is Christmas, sir. Burns: I say when it's Christmas.
Homer: You know what I've gotten into. Sleeping till noon. Carl: Well we better get going. Lenny: Some of us have to get up for work tomorrow. Homer: Hey just cause I'm not working doesn't mean I can't gripe like you guys. Dont you hate it when people steal your lunch out of the break room fridge? Carl: Actually that stopped after you left, Homer.
Homer: I STILL CALL THE SHOTS AROUND HERE! Marge: Homer use your inside voice. Homer: I DON'T HAVE AN INSIDE VOICE!
Homer: You be the girl and I'll be the car. Lisa: Dun-da-dun-dun, I'm go-ing to the organic market. Homer: Brrrrrrrrrrr- pew-pew, vrrrrrr! Screw the market, we're going to Mexico. It's El Flandorino. Run him down! Vrrrrrr Ned: I can't run, I'm wearing flip-flops!
Homer: Oh you'll win for sure. You and science go together like Lenny and Carl. The science is Carl.
Homer: Hey, maybe the internet has the information I need. It certainly answered a lot of my questions about wang enhancement.
Lisa: Mom, dad bought a device that would be deadly in the wrong hands, and he's holding it!
Bart: There's more than one way to lose a tooth. Hey idiot! You're fat and your mom's naked on the internet. You also smell. Nelson: Hmm, you've given me a lot to think about.
