Sherri/Terri: Lisa has a big butt, Lisa has a big butt! Lisa: Shut up, I do not! Sherri: Oh no, don't make Lisa mad. Terri: She might crush us all with her giant butt. Willie: Shut up you, stop teasing the big bottom lass. She's just as god made her. Plump as a Christmas goose. Homer: To downsize my derierre, I just tie a sweater around it. See. Oh Homer, you're wasting away to nothing, you simply must eat something. Oh well, you're the boss! Oh, I love to see my man eat!
Homer: Here's a mistake. It says the capital of Kentucky is Frank-fort. Haha, dream on pal! Marge: Homer, the capital of Kentucky is Frankfort! Homer: Really. Frankferter. Is that anything? Marge: Yes, it's something dear. Edna: Bart really did get 100. I did a test on state capitals but I forgot to roll up the map. Everyone got 100. Store Man: No no, the body on this mannequin is all wrong. Lisa: I know, it's such an unrealistic standard for young - huh? Store Man: Planing down the thighs, planing down the thighs, i make four bucks an hour, planing down the thighs. Marge: Plus your schoolyard chums, Martin and Ralph. Ralph: Bart's my bestest boyfriend.
Ralph: Duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck duck. Bart: Say goose you stupid freak! Ralph: :cries: Homer: Oh what's the big deal, Bart didn't like his presents. So what. It's not like he gives us such great gifts. Remember that maple leaf iron between the sheets of wax paper. What was that? That was crap! Skinner: They're just asserting their independence. If a child doesn't do it now it may never happen! Agnes: Seymour, do you want your vitamin in apple sauce or are you gonna take it like a big boy? Skinner: Apple sauce. Marge: Aren't you the boy who beats up my son? Nelson: Probably, what's your name? Marge: Simpson Nelson: Oh yeah, Bart Simpson. Spiky hair, soft kidneys, always hitting himself. Marge: Whaddya say, it'll be BLAM. Bart, Lisa, And Mom, huh? Bart: Mom, when I want lame and needy, I'll call Milhouse. No offense. Marge: Where's your dad in all of this. Nelson: He went out for a pack of cigarettes and never came back. He said smell ya later, but he never smelled me again. Nelson: Hey I'm sure it's just a phase, like when I used to stand on the overpass and drop computers on the freeway. Marge: That's how we got our K-pro. Terri: Hey Lisa, are you counting how many days it takes to wash your big butt? Lisa: I can't hear you! Sherri: That's because your butt blocks your ears. Lisa: That doesn't make any sense. Terri: Neither does your butt!
Marge: Go home to your son, Mrs. Muntz. And try not to have intercourse on the way!
Marge: Bart, have you ever eaten a tootsy pop? You know there's a tough crunchy shell, but if you lick it there's a delicious sweetness inside. Be nice to Nelson and I'll give you a tootsie pop.
Nelson: Papa can you hear me? Papa can you see me? Papa can you find me in the night? Papa are you near me, Papa can you hear me, Papa can you help me not be frightened. Looking at the skies I seem to see a million eyes, which ones are yours?
Nelson/Lisa/Kids: Sherri smells, Terri smells, stinky all the way. Stink stink stink, stink stink stink, one horse open sleigh!
Mrs. Muntz: I play lady MacBeth. I don't have to take my top off but I do anyway.
