Skinner: Now who's ever wondered how the Post Office works? ............. Anyone? Lisa: I.. did until we came here last year!
Postmaster Bill: Ho ho ho, howdy partners welcome to your Post Office! Bart: Wow, ours!? (messes up paper, draws on walls) Skinner: Bart! Bart: Be with you in a minute! Krusty: Legends of comedy my tookus... what has Fatty Arbuckle done that I haven't done!? Postmaster Bill: This machine reads zip codes. These five digits tell us where to direct your mail! Lisa: But it's nine digits now, what's the point of these other four numbers? Postmaster Bill: Those are citizen relocation codes. With any luck we'll never.. need them. Security Guy #1: She's onto us! Shall we flood the chamber? Security Guy #2: Not yet... Skinner: Any questions for Postmaster Bill? Nelson: Have you ever gone on a killing spree? Postmaster Bill: Ho ho ho, nooo noo, the day of the gun shot and the disgruntled postman went out with the Macarena. Skinner: Well, I'm just glad I work in an Elementary School. Postmaster Bill: You can each help yourself to one piece of undeliverable mail! Ralph: I'll take you!....... (dogs sniff package and growl) I got some dog food! Milhouse: I got my letter to Santa! Bart: A coupon book? What am I gonna do with this piece of junk -- Happy Birthday Dad! Homer: Wow, a Value-qual coupon book! Ten percent off carpet cleaning.. TEN! :gasp: Two pizza's for the price of one at Doughies!!! Lisa: Doughies have terrible pizza! Homer: Yeah but there's TWO!!! Homer: Seeya kids! Me and my value-qual book are going to paint the town red.... with savings!! I'll start with a couple of pizza's, then top it off with a Tango lesson... Wally Kogen: Hey you got off easy. I just came here to use the phone and they got me for the whole Road King package. Allignment Shock, Armorol, Stem Lube... Homer: Hehe, Stem Lube, even I didn't fall for that!... Although Winter is coming... Wally: Say, you wanna get a beer while we're waiting? Homer: Yeah, I'm getting tired of them pointing and laughing at us. Coach: Now what am I gonna do?..... YOU! Homer: Me!? Coach: Yeah you... get your hand off my wife's leg! Homer: Sorry! Homer: Hey, Moe! You wanna come with me and Wally to the Superbowl!? Moe: Oh absolutely, my favorite team's in it! The ... Atlanta Falcons ... Yeah, ever since I was a boy I've always loved the ... Atlanta Falcons ... Homer: Yeah, they're good, but I wouldn't cut out the ... Denver Broncos ... Wally: Yeah... I hear that President ... Clinton ... Is going to be watching with his wife ... Hillary ... Homer: C'mon Lenny, I need four more guys to fill my Superbowl bus.. what do you say? Lenny: Naaaahhh.. Homer: C'moon Lenny: Naaaahhh.. Homer: C'moooooon!! Lenny: Naaaahhh... Homer: Oh COME OOOOONNN! Lenny: Aww... Homer: Yes! Now that Lenny's in, Carl will fall like a domino! Lisa: Wow, you've signed up quite a few people, dad... Sea Captain, Bumblebee Man, Comic Book Guy, the Squeaky Voiced Teen... Homer: Yeah, it's a good group... "Roody": [ Runs after Homer's Superbowl Bus hoping to get on.. everybody tells him to get lost ] Wally: Well sports fans, I see you've found the beer supply, so lets all enjoy it in moderation Guys: Booooo! Wally: Hey don't make me come back there! Wally: Seriously now, If you have any questions, just ask our team leader Homer Simpson Homer: [drunk] La blah laoo laaa laa Wally: Or... me... uh, better ask me. Marge: Hm, it's so nice to have a peaceful weekend together... Lisa: Yeah I'm bored too... Wiggum: Alright alright, you guys have had way too much booze..... laaast call!! Wally: Hehe, I'm sorry, the guys kind of made a mess in your bathroom... Bus Driver: What bathroom...!? Dan Morino: [ Throws a ball to Bart that Homer catches. Dan gets his guards to beat Homer... ]
