Reverend Lovejoy: And, may we burn the inpainful and fowl smelling fire... aaaaaaammmmm.... en the night minister will be giving a guest sermon next Sunday, go in peace. Aaaaaammmmm <cough, cough> Homer: Don't make me come up there! Reverend Lovejoy: ...men.
Homer: Hang in there son, I'm taking us out for a traditional Sunday brunch (cuts off car) Driver: Idiot! Homer: He means you, Marge! Lisa: Oven roasted cud! Pimple Faced Kid: It's wrapped in it's own drool! Mom: Gavin honey, help mommy pick a cereal! How bout Alfalfa beds. Gavin: Those suck! I hate this store. Mom: But sweetheart mommy... Gavin: I hate you, too! I wanna live with one of my dads. Homer: [Homer tries to keep both the fish and Pinchy alive by adding more salt and water to the fish bowl] Marge: I'm going to tell the school you're staying home... Lisa: I'm afraid I can't allow that! Marge: Lisa! Lisa: Mom, no wait, we can make a deal! Marge: You don't have anything I want! Video Game: [Lisa plays the Australian 'Dash Dingo' game] Ralph: Hi Lisa, I brought your Homework! We have to read this! Lisa: The Wind In The Willows...? Ralph: It's about a toad and badger and a mole... I drawed on mine... is this my house? Lisa: No, you live in a different house....... Ralph: Choo choo choo choo woo woo! Guy On Video Game: Then I shall rule the Down-Underverse. Lisa: We'll see about that, mate! Lisa: Mr Toad has a red blank... okay, skip that one. Mr blank needs a blank in order to blank his blank.... oooh, I'm in deep blank. -dream sequence-
Hoover: And the lowest grade in the class ...
Ralph: She's going to say my name!
Hover: Lisa Simpson, zero!
Skinner: Lisa, the president of Harvard would like to see you.
Pres.: Nasty business, that zero. Naturally, Harvard's doors are now closed to you, but I'll pass your file along to ... Brown.
Skinner: Mmmm, Brown. Heckuva school. Weren't you at Brown, Otto?
Otto: Yup. Almost got tenure, too.
Lisa: [gasps in horror] No, not Brown, Brown.. -end dream-
Lisa: ...Brown, Brown.. Miss Hoover: Lisa, you're saying Brown an awful lot, are you okay? Lisa: Actually, I do feel a little feverish... Miss Hoover: Aww, don't worry about the test, just get yourself a nice drink of water..... THEN come back and finish the test! Lisa: I'll get a zero for sure, Bart, what am I gonna do? Bart: Well, if it was me, I'd just take the zero... uh, but that's not for everyone. Lisa: Hey! I can't go in there! Bart: Relax, there's nothing in here you didn't see when dad boycotted pants. Willy: Good for you, lass. I got a zero once, and my life turned out just fine :cleans out toilet with hand:. Oooh.. that's a nasty clog... ooh, you've got yourself a partner have ya? Miss Hoover: I graded this mornings test over lunch. And most of you did quite well. Ralph: I got a B! Miss Hoover: No Ralph, that's an F. I must have spilled some kahlua. Perfect Lisa, and you got all the extra credit questions. Even the one that got cut off by the copy machine. Lisa: Heehmmm, I guess I was just on a roll. Miss Hoover: Don't be so modest Lisa, you earned that A plus plus plus. Lisa: Actually, there are four plusses. Miss Hoover: No, that's dramboie. Homer: And now for the main course... Steamed Maine Cabbages! Bart: Pardon me for asking, but where the hell's my stupid lobster? Homer: We're not eating Mr. Pinchy, he's part of the family now. Pinchy, I made you some Risotto. Bart/Lisa/Marge: Oh Dad/Homer! Homer: What's your problem, veggie, you don't even eat lobster. Lisa: No, but I enjoy the smell. Skinner: Your dovotion to scholarship is a shining becan to all who's... Lisa: Stop it! I cheated. Cheated cheated cheated cheated cheated! Skinner: Lisa, what are you trying to say? Lisa: I CHEATED! Skinner: Check out the new scoreboard. [babbadabumdabum, chaaarge!]. I'm still learning all the buttons. Lisa: Well if you're going to cover this up I'll just have to go over your head to Super [half time buzz] Intendant [fowl] Chalmers! [nuclear explosion] Chalmers: Skinnnneeeer! I am outraged that you kept this from me. You were supposed to call as soon as the new scoreboard was in! Chalmers: A little travelling music Seymour [bumbumbumbumbum bumbumbum...] Skinner: We can buy real Periodic Tables instead of these promotional ones from Oscar Meyer. Edna: Now who can tell me the atomic weight of balonium? Martin: Ooh, delicious! Edna: Correct, I would also accept Snacktacular. Skinner: And for the first time ever, our computer lab actually has a computer in it. Ralph: Hi Lisa! Hi Super Nintendo Chalmers........ <meow> I'm learnding! Homer: Ooh, look, here's a little playmate for you!....... Hey, you don't have to take that from no punk-ass crab!
