season one

Some Enchanted Evening(9 Quotes)
7G02Bart The Genius(9 Quotes)
7G03Homer's Odyssey(12 Quotes)
7G04There's No Disgrace Like Home(12 Quotes)
7G05Bart The General(11 Quotes)
7G06Moaning Lisa(8 Quotes)
7G07The Telltale Head(10 Quotes)
7G08Simpsons Roasting On An Open Fire(13 Quotes)
7G09Call Of The Simpsons(10 Quotes)
7G10Homer's Night Out(9 Quotes)
7G11Life On The Fast Lane(9 Quotes)
7G12Krusty Gets Busted(11 Quotes)
7G13The Crepes Of Wrath(9 Quotes)

season two
7F012 Cars In Garage, 3 Eyes On Fish(10 Quotes)
7F02Simpson And Delilah(12 Quotes)
7F03Bart Gets An F(11 Quotes)
7F04Treehouse Of Horror(10 Quotes)
7F05Dancin' Homer(12 Quotes)
7F06Bart The Daredevil(10 Quotes)
7F07Bart Vs. Thanksgiving(13 Quotes)
7F08Dead Putting Society(14 Quotes)
7F09Itchy & Scratchy & Marge(7 Quotes)
7F10Bart Gets Hit By A Car(6 Quotes)
7F111 Fish, 2 Fish, Blowfish Bluefish(13)
7F12The Way We Was(7 Quotes)
7F13Homer Vs. Lisa & 8th Commandment(5)
7F14Bart's Dog Gets An F(11 Quotes)
7F15Principal Charming(7 Quotes)
7F16Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?(10 Quotes)
7F17Old Money(10 Quotes)
7F18Brush With Greatness(10 Quotes)
7F19Lisa's Substitute(10 Quotes)
7F20The War Of The Simpsons(10 Quotes)
7F21Three Men And A Comic Book(10 Quotes)
7F22Blood Feud(10 Quotes)

season three
7F23When Flanders Failed(11 Quotes)
7F24Stark Raving Dad(10 Quotes)
8F01Mr. Lisa Goes To Washington(9 Quotes)
8F02Treehouse Of Horror II(13 Quotes)
8F03Bart The Murderer(8 Quotes)
8F04Homer Defined(10 Quotes)
8F05Like Father, Like Clown(18 Quotes)
8F06Lisa's Pony(9 Quotes)
8F07Saturdays Of Thunder(9 Quotes)
8F08Flaming Moe's(10 Quotes)
8F09Burns Verkaufen Der Kraftwerk(9 Quotes)
8F10I Married Marge(5 Quotes)
8F11Radio Bart(12 Quotes)
8F12Lisa The Greek(10 Quotes)
8F13Homer At The Bat(14 Quotes)
8F14Homer Alone(7 Quotes)
8F15Separate Vocations(15 Quotes)
8F16Bart The Lover(18 Quotes)
8F17Dog Of Death(10 Quotes)
8F19Colonel Homer(12 Quotes)
8F20Black Widower(20 Quotes)
8F21The Otto Show(12 Quotes)
8F22Bart's Friend Falls In Love(18 Quotes)
8F23Brother, Can You Spare Two Dimes?(10 Quotes)

season four
8F18A Streetcar Named Marge(9 Quotes)
8F24Kamp Krusty(12 Quotes)
9F01Homer The Heretic(20 Quotes)
9F02Lisa The Beauty Queen(15 Quotes)
9F03Itchy & Scratchy: The Movie(14 Quotes)
9F04Treehouse Of Horror III(18 Quotes)
9F05Marge Gets A Job(11 Quotes)
9F06New Kid On The Block(16 Quotes)
9F07Mr. Plow(12 Quotes)
9F08Lisa's First Word(17 Quotes)
9F09Homer's Triple Bypass(13 Quotes)
9F10Marge Vs. The Monorail(14 Quotes)
9F11Selma's Choice(12 Quotes)
9F12Brother From The Same Planet(15 Quotes)
9F13I Love Lisa(14 Quotes)
9F14Duffless(11 Quotes)
9F15Last Exit To Springfield(18 Quotes)
9F16The Front(12 Quotes)
9F17So It's Come To This: A Clip Show(10 Quotes)
9F18Whacking Day(10 Quotes)
9F19Krusty Gets Kancelled(14 Quotes)
9F20Marge In Chains(13 Quotes)

season five
9F21Homer's Barbershop Quartet(14 Quotes)
9F22Cape Feare(9 Quotes)
1F01Rosebud(20 Quotes)
1F02Homer Goes To College(12 Quotes)
1F03Marge On The Lam(13 Quotes)
1F04Treehouse Of Horror IV(17 Quotes)
1F05Bart's Inner Child(11 Quotes)
1F06Boy-Scoutz N The Hood(10 Quotes)
1F07The Last Temptation Of Homer(17 Quotes)
1F08$pringfield(16 Quotes)
1F09Homer The Vigilante(9 Quotes)
1F10Homer And Apu(16 Quotes)
1F11Bart Gets Famous(10 Quotes)
1F12Lisa Vs. Malibu Stacy
1F13Deep Space Homer
1F14Homer Loves Flanders
1F15Bart Gets An Elephant
1F16Burns' Heir
1F18Sweet Seymour Skinner's Badass Song
1F19The Boy Who Knew Too Much
1F20Secrets Of A Successful Marriage
1F21Lady Bouvier's Lover

season six
1F17Lisa's Rival
1F22Bart Of Darkness
2F01Itchy & Scratchy Land
2F02Sideshow Bob Roberts
2F03Treehouse Of Horror V
2F04Bart's Girlfriend
2F05Lisa On Ice
2F06Homer: Bad Man
2F07Grampa Vs. Sexual Inadequacy
2F08Fear Of Flying
2F09Homer The Great
2F10And Maggie Makes Three
2F11Bart's Comet
2F12Homie The Clown
2F13Bart Vs. Australia
2F14Homer Vs. Patty And Selma(13 Quotes)
2F15Lisa's Wedding(9 Quotes)
2F16Who Shot Mr. Burns? (Part One)
2F18Two Dozen And One Greyhounds(8 Quotes)
2F19The PTA Disbands(13 Quotes)
2F21The Springfield Connection(13 Quotes)
2F22Lemon Of Troy(17 Quotes)
2F31A Star Is Burns
2F32'Round Springfield
2F33Another Simpsons Clip Show

season seven
2F17Radioactive Man(11 Quotes)
2F20Who Shot Mr. Burns? (Part Two)
3F01Home Sweet Homediddly-Dum-Doodily(15 Quotes)
3F02Bart Sells His Soul(13 Quotes)
3F03Lisa The Vegetarian(19 Quotes)
3F04Treehouse Of Horror VI
3F05King-Size Homer(14 Quotes)
3F06Mother Simpson
3F07Marge Be Not Proud(17 Quotes)
3F08Sideshow Bob's Last Gleaming(11 Quotes)
3F09Two Bad Neighbors(26 Quotes)
3F10Team Homer(12 Quotes)
3F11Scenes From Class Struggle In Spring..
3F12Bart The Fink
3F13Lisa The Iconoclast
3F14Homer The Smithers(8 Quotes)
3F15A Fish Called Selma(9 Quotes)
3F16The Day Violence Died(14 Quotes)
3F17Bart On The Road(10 Quotes)
3F1822 Short Films About Springfield(24 Quotes)
3F19The Curse Of The Flying Hellfish
3F20Much Apu About Nothing
3F21Homerpalooza(16 Quotes)
3F22Summer Of 4 Ft. 2(16 Quotes)
3F31The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular

season eight
3F23You Only Move Twice(17 Quotes)
3F24El Viaje Misterioso Nuestro Jomer
3G01The Springfield Files
4F01Lisa's Date With Density
4F02Treehouse Of Horror VII
4F03The Homer They Fall
4F04A Milhouse Divided
4F05Burns, Baby Burns
4F06Bart After Dark
4F07Hurricane Neddy
4F08Twisted World Of Marge Simpson
4F09Grade School Confidential
4F10Mountain Of Madness
4F11Homer's Phobia(18 Quotes)
4F12Itchy & Scratchy & Poochie Show
4F13My Sister, My Sitter
4F14Brother From Another Series(13 Quotes)
4F15Homer Vs. The Eighteenth Amendment
4F16The Canine Mutiny(10 Quotes)
4F17The Old Man And The Lisa
4F18In Marge We Trust
4F19Homer's Enemy
4F20The Simpsons Spin-Off Showcase
4F21The Secret War Of Lisa Simpson

season nine
4F22The City Of New York Vs. Homer Simpson(6 Quotes)
4F23The Principal And The Pauper(10 Quotes)
4F24Lisa The Simpson(8 Quotes)
5F01The Cartridge Family(7 Quotes)
5F02Treehouse Of Horror VIII(5 Quotes)
5F03Bart Star(10 Quotes)
5F04The Two Mrs. Nahasapeemapetilons(6 Quotes)
5F05Lisa The Skeptic(7 Quotes)
5F06Realty Bites(7 Quotes)
5F07Miracle On Evergreen Terrace(10 Quotes)
5F08Bart Carny(7 Quotes)
5F09Trash Of The Titans(14 Quotes)
5F10The Last Temptation Of Krust(9 Quotes)
5F11Das Bus(10 Quotes)
5F12Dumbbell Indemnity(9 Quotes)
5F13This Little Wiggy(14 Quotes)
5F14The Trouble With Trillions(7 Quotes)
5F15Girly Edition(12 Quotes)
5F16King Of The Hill(13 Quotes)
5F17Lost Our Lisa(20 Quotes)
5F18Natural Born Kissers(8 Quotes)
5F23The Joy Of Sect(10 Quotes)
5F24All Singing, All Dancing(2 Quotes)
3G02Lisa's Sax(10 Quotes)
3G04Simpson Tide(9 Quotes)

season ten
5F19When You Dish Upon A Star(17 Quotes)
5F20Lard Of The Dance
5F21Wizard Of Evergreen Terrace(22 Quotes)
5F22Bart The Mother(17 Quotes)
AABF01Treehouse Of Horror IX(20 Quotes)
AABF02D'oh-in' In The Wind(12 Quotes)
AABF03Lisa Gets An "A"(22 Quotes)
AABF04Homer Simpson In: Kidney Trouble(25 Quotes)
AABF05Mayored To The Mob(23 Quotes)
AABF06Viva Ned Flanders(17 Quotes)
AABF07Wild Barts Can't Be Broken
AABF08Sunday, Cruddy Sunday(34 Quotes)
AABF09Homer To The Max
AABF10Marge Simpson In: Screaming Yellow Honkers
AABF11I'm With Cupid
AABF12Make Room For Lisa
AABF13Maximum Homerdrive
AABF14Simpsons Bible Stories
AABF15Mom And Pop Art
AABF16The Old Man And The "C" Student
AABF17Monty Can't Buy Me Love
AABF18They Saved Lisa's Brain
AABF20Thirty Minutes Over Tokyo

season eleven
AABF19E-I-E-I-D'oh!(20 Quotes)
AABF21Guess Who's Coming To Criticize Dinner(21 Quotes)
AABF22Brother's Little Helper(17 Quotes)
AABF23Beyond Blunderdome(30 Quotes)
BABF01Treehouse Of Horror X(17 Quotes)
BABF02Hello Gutter, Hello Fadder(14 Quotes)
BABF03Eight Misbehavin'(20 Quotes)
BABF04Little Big Mom(14 Quotes)
BABF05Take My Wife, Sleaze(16 Quotes)
BABF06Faith Off(12 Quotes)
BABF07Grift Of The Magi(17 Quotes)
BABF08The Mansion Family(19 Quotes)
BABF09Saddlesore Galactica(15 Quotes)
BABF10Alone Again, Natura-Diddly(23 Quotes)
BABF11Missionary: Impossible(18 Quotes)
BABF12Pygmoelian(13 Quotes)
BABF13Bart To The Future(14 Quotes)
BABF14Days Of Wine And D'oh'ses(20 Quotes)
BABF15Last Tap Dance In Springfield(27 Quotes)
BABF16Kill The Alligator And Run(17 Quotes)
BABF18It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Marge(22 Quotes)
BABF19Behind The Laughter(39 Quotes)

season twelve
BABF17Insane Clown Poppy(19 Quotes)
BABF20A Tale Of Two Springfields(17 Quotes)
BABF21Treehouse Of Horror XI(12 Quotes)
BABF22HOMR(18 Quotes)
CABF01Lisa The Tree Hugger(15 Quotes)
CABF02The Computer Wore Menace Shoes(16 Quotes)
CABF03The Great Money Caper(12 Quotes)
CABF04Homer Vs. Dignity(12 Quotes)
CABF05Pokey Mom(17 Quotes)
CABF06Skinner's Sense Of Snow(23 Quotes)
CABF07Tennis The Menace(19 Quotes)
CABF08Worst Episode Ever(27 Quotes)
CABF09Hungry Hungry Homer(18 Quotes)
CABF10Day Of The Jackanapes(23 Quotes)
CABF11Bye Bye Nerdie(22 Quotes)
CABF12New Kids On The Blecch(24 Quotes)
CABF13Simpson Safari(14 Quotes)
CABF14Trilogy Of Error(27 Quotes)
CABF15I'm Goin' To Praiseland(21 Quotes)
CABF16Children Of A Lesser Clod(26 Quotes)
CABF17Simpsons Tall Tales(14 Quotes)

season thirteen
CABF18A Hunka Hunka Burns In Love(34 Quotes)
CABF19Treehouse Of Horror XII(38 Quotes)
CABF20Homer The Moe(24 Quotes)
CABF21The Blunder Years(32 Quotes)
CABF22The Parent Rap(31 Quotes)
DABF01Brawl In The Family(24 Quotes)
DABF02She Of Little Faith(28 Quotes)
DABF03Sweets And Sour Marge(35 Quotes)
DABF04Half Decent Proposal(31 Quotes)
DABF05Jaws Wired Shut(22 Quotes)
DABF06The Bart Wants What It Wants(31 Quotes)
DABF07The Lastest Gun In The West(30 Quotes)
DABF08Tales From The Public Domain(30 Quotes)
DABF09The Old Man And The Key(28 Quotes)
DABF10Blame It On Lisa(28 Quotes)
DABF11Weekend At Burnsies(31 Quotes)
DABF12Gump Roast(15 Quotes)
DABF13I Am Furious (Yellow)(26 Quotes)
DABF14The Sweetest Apu(28 Quotes)
DABF15Little Girl In The Big Ten(30 Quotes)
DABF16The Frying Game(28 Quotes)
DABF17Poppa's Got A Brand New Badge(33 Quotes)

season fourteen
DABF18Large Marge(15 Quotes)
DABF19Treehouse Of Horror XIII(25 Quotes)
DABF20Bart Vs. Lisa Vs. The Third Grade(15 Quotes)
DABF21Helter Shelter(10 Quotes)
DABF22How I Spent My Strummer Vacation(11 Quotes)
EABF01The Great Louse Detective(12 Quotes)
EABF02Special Edna
EABF03The Dad Who Knew Too Little
EABF04Strong Arms Of The Ma
EABF05Barting Over(32 Quotes)
EABF06Pray Anything
EABF07I'm Spelling As Fast As I Can(35 Quotes)
EABF08A Star Is Born-Again(30 Quotes)
EABF09Mr. Spritz Goes To Washington
EABF10C. E. D'oh!(32 Quotes)
EABF11'Scuse Me While I Miss The Sky
EABF12Three Gays Of The Condo
EABF13Dude, Where's My Ranch?
EABF14Old Yeller Belly
EABF15Brake My Wife, Please
EABF16Bart Of War(28 Quotes)
EABF17Moe Baby Blues

season fifteen
EABF18My Mother, The Carjacker(28 Quotes)
EABF19The Fat And The Furriest(27 Quotes)
EABF20The President Wore Pearls(35 Quotes)
EABF21Treehouse Of Horror XIV(25 Quotes)
EABF22The Regina Monologues(31 Quotes)
FABF01Today, I Am A Clown(32 Quotes)
FABF02'Tis The Fifteenth Season(30 Quotes)
FABF03Marge Vs. Singles, Seniors, Teens, Gays(23)
FABF04I, D'oh-Bot(23 Quotes)
FABF05Diatribe Of A Mad Housewife(29 Quotes)
FABF06Margical History Tour(24 Quotes)
FABF07Milhouse Doesn't Live Here Anymore(24 Quotes)
FABF08The Ziff Who Came To Dinner(24 Quotes)
FABF09Smart And Smarter(24 Quotes)
FABF10Co-Dependent's Day(25 Quotes)
FABF11The Wandering Juvie(25 Quotes)
FABF12My Big Fat Geek Wedding(31 Quotes)
FABF13The Way We Weren't(26 Quotes)
FABF14Catch 'Em If You Can(19 Quotes)
FABF15Simple Simpson(22 Quotes)
FABF17Bart-Mangled Banner(20 Quotes)
FABF18Fraudcast News(21 Quotes)

season sixteen
FABF16Midnight Rx(25 Quotes)
FABF19Sleeping With The Enemy(19 Quotes)
FABF20All's Fair In Oven War(20 Quotes)
FABF21Fat Man And Little Boy(22 Quotes)
FABF22She Used To Be My Girl(20 Quotes)
FABF23Treehouse Of Horror XV(18 Quotes)
GABF01Mommie Beerest(22 Quotes)
GABF02Homer And Ned's Hail Mary Pass(19 Quotes)
GABF03Pranksta Rap(20 Quotes)
GABF04There's Something About Marrying(23 Quotes)
GABF05On A Clear Day I Can't See My Sister(15 Quotes)
GABF06Goo Goo Gai Pan(18 Quotes)
GABF07Mobile Homer(19 Quotes)
GABF08The Seven Beer Snitch(18 Quotes)
GABF09The Father, Son & Holy Guest Star(16 Quotes)
GABF10Don't Fear The Roofer(18 Quotes)
GABF11The Heartbroke Kid(26 Quotes)
GABF12Future-Drama(20 Quotes)
GABF13A Star Is Torn(20 Quotes)
GABF14Thank God It's Doomsday(17 Quotes)
GABF15Home Away From Homer(15 Quotes)

season seventeen
GABF16The Girl Who Slept Too Little(15 Quotes)
GABF17Treehouse Of Horror XVI(15 Quotes)
GABF18Bonfire Of The Manatees(16 Quotes)
GABF19Milhouse Of Sand And Fog(20 Quotes)
GABF20Marge's Son Poisoning(19 Quotes)
GABF21See Homer Run(13 Quotes)
GABF22Last Of The Red Hat Mamas(13 Quotes)
HABF01Simpsons Christmas Stories(15 Quotes)
HABF02The Italian Bob(15 Quotes)
HABF03Homer's Paternity Coot(15 Quotes)
HABF04We're On The Road To D'oh-where(12)
HABF05My Fair Laddy(13 Quotes)
HABF06The Seemingly Never-Ending Story
HABF07Bart Has Two Mommies
HABF08Homer Simpson, This Is Your Wife
HABF09Million Dollar Abie
HABF10Kiss Kiss, Bang Bangalore
HABF11The Wettest Stories Ever Told
HABF12Girls Just Want To Have Sums
HABF13Regarding Margie
HABF14The Monkey Suit
HABF16Homer And Marge Turn A Couple Play

Gym Teacher: I see you like reading. How do you like Bombardment. BOMBARDMENT! BOMBARDMENT!

Gym Teacher: Van Houten?
Milhouse: Here sir, but my doctor says no more bombardment.
Gym Teacher: Well here's a second opinion! :bombards him:
Willie: All I want is a place somewhere...
Oh, to have my shack rebuilt
Get my rotten teeth all drill't
Something on underneath me kilt
Oh, wouldn't it be adequate?
Matching shoes for both me feet
Dining on untainted meat
A toilet what still has its seat
Homer: Oh, wouldn't it be adequate?
Bart/Lisa: Adequate - adequate
Willie: Wouldn't it be adequate?
Lisa: Okay, how do you address an archbishop?
Willie: I'll kill ya! I'll kill ya for what ye done to me!
Marge: Wow, it glows in the dark!
Homer: It's not supposed to!

Willie: What flows from the nose
Does not go on my clothes
Lisa: I think he's got it Oh yes, he's got it
Willie: What flows from the nose
Does not go on my clothes
Gah! A talkin' mirror! Gah!
Lisa: Where is that ghastly flow?
Willie: The nose - the nose!
Lisa: And where should it not go?
Homer: Blue pants - blue pants!
Lisa: Dad, get your own song!
Homer: Fine! I'm gettin' blue pants in the morning
Ding dong, the zipper's gonna shine!
Moe: I don't get this. This guy paints his noggin, and you guys are ready to buy pants. Meanwhile I been paying for that billboard outside for a year now and it's not yielding nothing.
Billboard: You don't have to look at me! You don't have to look at me!
Woman: Well, he does have billboard money. Talking billboard money!
Willie: I feel like I...
Could be indoors all night
Could use a fork and knife
And never soil my suit
I could be so polite
Start not a scene nor fight
And still not feel like a fruit
How very nice that there's no lice in my hair
And my toenails I don't bite
Now that I've reached the stage
Where I'm not full of rage
I could be indoors
Indoors all night
Willie: May I help you sir.
Gym Teacher: These rolls are stale! Bombardment! Bring me some more! Bombardment! And some ice tea for the lady please. Bombardment!
Willie: I've a fancy suit
And a clean white shirt
But I miss the days
When tractor fumes blew off my skirt
I was freezing cold
And I slept in mold
But I long for the shack where I lived
She was true to me
My old home of wood
And when I passed out from turpentine
She understood
Life was so sublime
Mr. Largo: Well, boo hoo, 'cause I'm
Hanging ferns in the shack where you lived
If I had your voice I'd talk-sing everything.
Skinner: It is with great joy and a sense of once again everything is back to where it started that we welcome our once and future groundskeeper Willie.
Willie: Heaven, I'm in heaven.
Willie, please express yourself through mopping.

Our archive contains 4768 Quotes / 286 Episodes, 10 complete seasons

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