7F08: Dead Putting Society
SEASON TWO :: 14 Quotes
Homer: There's nothing wrong with crab grass. It just has a bad name, that's all. Everyone would love it if it had a cute name like "Elf grass"
putting1.mp3
Ned: This your first visit to the Flanders homestead, eh?
Homer: What, we've only been neighbors for..... eight years.
putting2.mp3
Homer: You've been rubbing my nose in it since I got there! Your family is better than my family, your beer comes from further away than my beer, you and your son like each other, your wife's butt is higher than my wife's butt, you make me sick!
Ned: Simpson! I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave! I hope you understand!
Homer: I wouldn't stay on a bet! :gulps beer, takes club sandwich: One for the road.
putting3.mp3
Homer: He said, that... he said ... well it wasn't so much what he said, it was how he said it.
Marge: Well how did he say it?
Homer: Well, he..
Marge: Was he angry?
Homer: No.
Marge: Was he rude?
Homer: Okay, it wasn't how he said it either. But the message was loud and clear. Our family stinks!
putting4.mp3
Ned: Hello, Reverend Lovejoy?
Helen: No, this is Mrs. Lovejoy. Just a minute. Honey, honey wake up. It sounds as if Ned Flanders is having some sort of crisis.
Reverend: Probably stepped on a worm.
putting5.mp3
Homer: You are my brother. Ahahaha. I love you. Ahahehehehe. And yet, I feel a great sadness.... in my bosom!
putting6.mp3
Bart: Bart: 41. Homer: lets see... 6 plus 6 plus 6 plus 6 plus 6..
Homer: Never mind!
putting7.mp3
Homer: That putter is to you what a bat is to a baseball player; what a violin is to a... the guy, the violin guy!
putting8.mp3
Homer: Give your putter a name
Bart: What?
Homer: Come on, give it a name!
Bart: Mr. Putter.
Homer: You wanna try a little harder, son!? Come on, give it a girls name.
Bart: Mom.
Homer: Your putter's name is Sharlene!
Bart: Why?
Homer: It just is, that's why.
putting9.mp3
Homer: Todd Flanders; every day I want you to spend fifteen minutes staring at it and concentrating on how much you hate him, and how glorious it will be when you and Sharlene annihilate him!
Bart: Who's Sharlene?
Homer: I'll show you who Sharlene is! Now start hating!
putting10.mp3
Lisa: I want you to shut off the logical part of your mind.
Bart: Okay.
Lisa: Embrace nothingness.
Bart: You got it.
Lisa: Become like an uncarved stone.
Bart: Done.
Lisa: Bart! You're just pretending to know what I'm talking about!
Bart: True.
Lisa: Well it's very frustrating!
Bart: I'll bet.
putting11.mp3
Homer: All I'm asking is that you'll try.
Bart: Okay I'll try.
Homer: Anyone can try! I want you to win!
putting12.mp3
Homer: Hey, Flanders, there's no use praying, I already did the same thing and we can't both win.
Ned: Actually, SimpSON, we were praying that no-one gets hurt!
Homer: Oh, well, FlanDERS, it doesn't matter. This time tomorrow you'll be wearing high heels.
Ned: Nope, you will.
Homer: 'Fraid not.
Ned: 'Fraid so.
Homer: 'Fraid not.
Ned: 'Fraid so!
Homer: 'Fraid not, infinity!
Ned: 'Fraid so, infinity, plus one!
Homer: D'oh!
putting13.mp3
Homer: Come on, Bart. Remember what Vince Lombardi said. If you lose, you're out of the family!
putting14.mp3 |
