CABF06: Skinner's Sense Of Snow
SEASON TWELVE :: 23 Quotes
Wardrobe Guy: I am sick of your jokes about the wardrobe. You people can dress yourselves!
Sports Presenter: Well folks he's got a point, with all our unscripted horseplay we sometimes don't think about...
Homer: Lenny! Are you watching this?
Lenny: Yeah, they really hurt that guy's feelings!
Homer: I know!
Marge: Finally a circus full of whimsy and wonder!
Homer: Oh yeah that's way better than fun and excitement.
Lisa: As French Canadians, they don't believe in refunds or exploiting animals for entertainement.
Homer: Oh I really wanted to see them fire a gorilla out of a cannon!
Marge: They always pick the guy with the wires!
Sea Captain: Yarr! Help! I was tied here by teenage pirates!
Radio Presenter: And lastly Springfield Elementary School... is open! And it's open season on savings at Springfield Menswear. Which is closed!
Bart: Oh everyone's off but us!
Marge: Oh stop! Your father and I don't get the day off.
Homer: Lenny says we've got the day off!
Chief Wiggum: Ah yeah Clancy, spell your name... Hey Lou, could you shake out the last few drops for me?
Lou: Yeah, no problem chief. Seems like a waste of coffee though.
Marge: This is terrible! How will the kids get home?
Homer: I dunno. Internet?
Flanders: Well I'm all for rescuing the kids but I wish you hadn't sawed off my roof!
Homer: My car, your roof. It's only fair!
Flanders: But it's my car!
Homer: Well.. yeah.
Flanders: Hey, whatever happened to the Plow from your old snow plow business?
Homer: I never had a snow plow business!
Flanders: Sure you did, Mr. Plow. You're wearing the jacket right now!
Homer: I think I know my own life, Ned. :sings: Call Mr. Plow, that's my name, that name again is Mr. Plow.
Skinner: Think, Skinner, think! What would Superintendant Chalmers do?
Skinner: Ah, that's no help.
Skinner: We're all going to sit tight and reminisce about candy bars!
Guy: Uh well uuh, one time, I'm eating a candy bar at the beach, and a girl starts taking off her bathing suit!
Skinner: Get back to the candy bar!
Flanders: I think we hit something!
Homer: I hope it's Flanders. Hehehehe! I'm just kidding!
[ Homer sings 'Feel Like Making Love' and tells Ned he wrote it himself, as a tribute to Princess Diana and Dodi ]
Ralph: Mr. Army Man? I can't sleep without my Reggie Rabbit!
Skinner: Is that some sort of plush novelty?
Ralph: Yes ma'am.
Skinner: Uh, well here's a scouring pad, it's just as good.
Ralph: It's cold and hurty!
Willy: Okay Skinner. That's the last time you'll slap your willy around. I quit!
Bart: What's the problem, Seymour? Stuck?
Skinner: That's precisely the problem and you know it. Now get me out of here!
Bart: What's that? You want the pee bucket on your head?
Skinner: No! You're twisting my words!
Skinner: I can't write this. It's a grammatical nightmare. And I'm getting a cramp in my wrist!
Bart: After all the times I've done it my wrist sounds like a cement mixer.
Nelson: Hey, look how much Skinner makes. 25,000 dollars a year!
Bart: Lets see, he's 40 years old, times 25 grand.. woah! He's a millionaire!
Skinner: I wasn't a principal when I was one!
Skinner: If you get me out of this there's a hall monitor position coming open in the Spring.
Nelson: I spit on your monitors.
Skinner: I know. That's why the position's available.
Skinner: You did it, Nibbles! Now... chew through my ball sack!
Skinner: Bart, if there's one thing I'm good at, it's pretending things didn't happen. And I think this is one of those.
Bart: One of which?
Bart: No, seriously, I wasn't listening.
Skinner: One of those situations where..
Scene: [ the episode ends with Homer being gassed out, Lisa turns into a Moose and Bart's an exotic woman. Lisa wishes you a Merry Christmas ]